


(take my heart, no new start) Please Just Let Me Fall Apart

by dls



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Comfort No Hurt, Drabbles, Fluff, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark-centric, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-11-15 01:38:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 8,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dls/pseuds/dls
Summary: Prompt fills forWhumptober 2019.Each chapter is a stand-alone ficlet, 200-300 words, featuring Tony Stark and his A.I.s/bots.





	1. Shaky Hands

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! This is my first time participating in a daily writing challenge and it is my hope that I can complete all 31 prompts <strike>because my OCD tendencies demand it</strike>. Wish me luck! 
> 
> References/Quotes:   
Title from "Make Me A Robot" by Tessa Violet.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Age of Ultron._   


_Three minutes. Get what you need. _

Steve's words echoed in Tony's head as he practically collapsed into the chair at his work station. His entire body felt heavy, weighed down by more than fatigue and fear. There was a scream lodged in his throat and an emptiness in his chest. 

With shaky hands, he sorted through the small collection of user interface chips.

JOCASTA and TADASHI and FRIDAY.

All of them were more than qualified for the job and none of them were what he wanted.

What he wanted was to rest, close his eyes and wake up from this nightmare, but there was a war to be won and a world to save. And to do that, he needed a new assistant program for the Iron Man armor. It all made sense. No one could or would fault him for it but Tony couldn't help but feel guilty.

Because replacing JARVIS felt like betrayal, not only of the brilliant A.I. who had been a fixture in his life for the better part of a decade but also of the namesake who Tony had wanted to honor. Old pain exacerbated by new grief, layers upon layers of loss he never truly processed.

Stark men were made of iron, after all.

So, Tony forced himself to breathe, ignoring how every inhale felt like choking and controlling his exhales so they wouldn't come out as sobs. There was no time for his personal shit and he should just suck it up. He inserted the chip. 

"Good evening, boss." FRIDAY's Irish lilt flowed through the speakers, a difference that was both a relief from and a reminder of what he had lost.


	2. Explosion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man 3._   


Tony's eyes widened as he realized his error. He had miscalculated the trajectory when he shot the second of the three heavily-armed helicopters out of the sky.

Spinning wildly, the aircraft careened through the glass walls and exploded upon impact. The blast ripped through the open floor plan, slamming him into the marble tiles, which offered no purchase against his scrabbling fingers as he fell through the crater in his once immaculate living room and crashed into his workshop below.

Rolling with the momentum, Tony ignored the dull ache in his back and gripped onto what remained of his work bench, bolted into the concrete for additional stability. Despite the armor's filtration system, he could taste the specks of ash in the air. Smoke and fire, the sharp bite of destruction that singed taste buds and turned everything bitter.

His chest tighten at the sound of DUM-E's soft whine, almost sad in its low pitch, and his heart shattered at the sight of the severed robotic arm in the rubble.

U was nowhere to be found.

Tony wanted to reach out, to gently thump DUM-E's side panel like he had done countless times before, to tell his robot kid that everything would be okay. A lie, for sure, but parents lied all time to their children in the name of comfort.

Or so he had heard.

He lifted a gauntleted hand, straining to make contact.

That was when the two other missiles hit and his entire world went up in flames before it was swallowed up by the ocean waves.


	3. Delirium

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


"DUM-E." Tony slurred, the syllables sticky in the dryness of his mouth. His chest burned. Had he fallen asleep with the blow torch on again? DUM-E was supposed to be on fire safety duty. "DUM-E."

"Already insulting." A loud bark of laughter that sounded almost violent and carried no humor. "Typical American."

Darkness dragged him under before he could process those mocking words.

*

Tony's dreams were filled with fire and sand and blood and pain. His head throbbed when he tried to shake those disturbing images away, a dull but persistent ache that either signaled a hangover or a fever. He would guess the latter, though, going by how heavy all of his limbs felt and the chill numbing his fingers.

"Hey, U." He called out, his voice no more than a croak and his throat painfully raw. Definitely sick. And definitely shouldn't have ducked out of that flu shot appointment Pepper had arranged for him.

Drops of water landed on his lips, lukewarm and not enough.

Tony lapped at them greedily, the small movement sapping him of his energy quickly. Too quickly. Something wasn't right...

"Mr. Stark, my name is Yinsen."

He heard as he succumbed to unconsciousness.

*

The next time Tony woke, his mind was clear and memories streamed back like lines of data across a screen.

The Jericho. The Fun-Vee. The ambush.

The smell of burning flesh. The buzz of a saw. The taste of blood.

A scream rose in his throat and he choked it down, refusing to give into panic and to show any signs of weakness.

_Stark men are made of iron. _

And iron was what he needed to be to get home to his friends, to Obie, and to JARVIS and the bots.


	4. Human Shield

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers_.   


"Sir..." JARVIS' normally crisp voice warbled before cutting out entirely.

The severed connection carried a sense of finality that sent a chill down Tony's spine, though that was nothing compared to the fear freezing his blood.

Before him, hundreds of ships filled the black expanse of space. Blue lights glittered from their depths, as cold as the Chitauri soldiers' unblinking eyes and as many as the stars in the sky.   
  
It had taken everything they had to slow the invasion in New York.   
  
_Slow_, not _stop_.   
  
It had taken everything they had to stay afloat, treading water with the false confidence of not knowing what lied below the surface.   
  
And now Tony knew... 

He wished he didn't.

What they had thought was a flood of attacks had merely been a trickle, through the narrow beam of energy prying open a gateway between worlds. Selvig had said he could close it but what would stop them - this unknown enemy with a vast army at their disposal - from reopening it? Or, simply and terrifyingly, launching a full-scaled attack?   
  
_If we can't protect the Earth, you can be damned well sure we'll avenge it._  
  
Except how could they avenge the Earth if they weren't powerful enough to protect it in the first place?   
  
Earth's Mightiest Heroes were nothing more than an enhanced, well-trained, and sometimes extremely angry human shield that couldn't even protect a city, let alone an entire planet.   
  
The missile slipped through his slack grip. It soared toward the fleet of ships, detonating upon impact and lighting up the darkness in a brilliant burst of flames that faded all too quickly as his eyes drifted shut. 


	5. Gunpoint

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Captain America: Civil War._   


"Boss, I don't recommend-"

Despite FRIDAY's protests, Tony retracted the suit's helmet as an olive branch that he hoped Steve would accept this time. "You seem a little defensive." He quipped, ignoring the pang of disappointment when Steve approached with his shield up.

Barnes adjusted his aim, the muzzle now pointed squarely between Tony's eyes.

Tony flexed his right hand, still bruised from catching the last shot Barnes had fired. Or rather, the Winter Soldier had fired since Barnes had been triggered back in Germany. A distinction Tony had no trouble making though Steve seemed to think otherwise, always doubting and disapproving of everything Tony did.

"It's been a long day." Steve replied cautiously.

"At ease, soldier. I'm not currently after you." Tony hadn't meant for there to be a bite in his words but Steve's suspicion stung as much as Barnes holding him at gunpoint rankled.

Steve's arms tensed, ready to attack. "Then why are you here?"

"Could be your story's not so crazy. Maybe." If his earlier quip had been an olive branch, this these next words were a white flag. Steve was never going to meet him halfway, Tony realized, the only way was Captain America's way. "Ross has no idea I'm here. I'd like to keep it that way. Otherwise, I got to arrest myself."

"Well, that sounds like a lot of paperwork." At last, Steve lowered his shield. "It's good to see you, Tony."

"You too, Cap." Tony smiled, relieved. Maybe they would make it through this mess after all.


	6. Dragged Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Compared to the others, this one is downright fluffy! 
> 
> A continuation of [Day 2 - Explosion](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/49616963).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man 3._   


The Malibu Point community looked exactly the same with its freshly paved street and impeccably kept landscape and million-dollar mansions.

Tony turned into the driveway slower than he usually did, mindful of the trailer hooked to the back of his car, empty for now but heavy with guilt. He should have waited to execute the Clean Slate Protocol until the Hammerhead armor had extracted DUM-E and U from the bottom of the ocean.

The memory of DUM-E, with his claw clamped tightly around U's robotic arm, being dragged away by the rush of currents haunted Tony's waking and sleeping hours.

JARVIS had fabricated a team of deep sea drones, outfitted with Mark XXXVII's water resistant plating and equipped with metal detectors, and deployed them while he was in surgery. Monitoring their search had been Tony's main source of distraction as he recovered, though Pepper had taken the StarkPad away when the frustration from the lack of progress elevated his blood pressure.

It had taken a week, seven agonizing days, before the scanners picked up a familiar shape and were able to establish a better perimeter.

Now here he was, overlooking a familiar oceanside view from a different vantage point. The rubble had been cleared away and construction for the new mansion was set to begin next month.

Because destruction was only the end if he let it be.

Tony was a mechanic and mechanics, well, they build and rebuild.

Starting with two idiotic robots who were more trouble than they were worth and absolutely invaluable.


	7. Isolation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to make up for all the hurt I've inflicted upon Tony with these fluffier drabbles...
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Captain America: Civil War_.   


A balled-up piece of paper hit Tony squarely on the forehead, startling his eyes open and nearly falling out of his chair. These days, closing his eyes was the closest to sleep he could manage. No dreams, just drifting along a blank kind of haziness until he felt rested enough to continue working on Rhodey's braces.

"What the hell?" He groused. His annoyance vanished when his glare met Rhodey's frown. Rhodey, who should be at the hospital and not maneuvering his wheelchair around the clutter in the workshop.

_Wheelchair. _

His best friend couldn't walk and it was all his fault-

Rhodey threw another balled-up piece of paper at him. "When was the last time you slept?" And another. "And ate something?" And another. "And took a shower?"

"Stop throwing things at me!" Tony batted them away. "What're you doing here?"

"Checking on my idiot best friend." Rhodey answered. "Who didn't answer my calls when I was discharged early and needed a ride home."

Tony swore. He had needed to concentrate, to fix what he had broken. So he had isolated himself in his workshop and instructed FRIDAY to not disturb him unless there was an emergency. That had been...shit, three days ago? "I'm sorry."

"It's fine. FRIDAY sent a driver and DUM-E let me in." The A.I. confirmed this and the bot waved cheerfully. "I figured you were pulling another one of your guilt binges." Rhodey shrugged. "So, here I am."

"Here you are." There was a lump in his throat, all the things he wanted to say and none of them enough. "Here you are." He repeated, slowly and softly, and felt the corners of his lips tug up into a smile.


	8. Stab Wound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man 2_.   


The bottle of hand sanitizer was slowly leaking onto the half-thawed ice pack. Band-aids of various sizes were scattered over the worktable, most were unopened and the few that weren't were stuck to the crumpled emergency blanket.

Butterfingers, true to his namesake, dropped a tube of antibiotic ointment. It bounced off of the single-use CPR mask and landed by Tony's feet. 

Tony picked it up and waved it at Butterfingers who was struggling to hold onto a pair of scissors. 

It probably wasn't the best idea to let a bot known for his clumsiness administer first aid. Normally, Tony wouldn't bother with bandaging the practically non-existent wound - a pinpoint prick from the lithium dioxide injection - on his neck but Butterfingers had been so panicked that Tony had agreed to let him help.

A roll of gauze tumbled across the floor. Butterfingers chased after it with a loud, reprimanding beep.

Letting his eyes drift shut, Tony tilted his head back and felt a slight twinge in his neck, a souvenir from SHIELD's less-than-gentle attempt to save his life. Romanoff, a trained assassin, had pretty much stabbed him with the syringe like she was trying to kill him instead of temporarily curing him. Maybe the ice pack wasn't such a bad idea after all.

Something metallic clattered to the floor, followed by a loud trill that sounded like a whine.

Tony slouched further in his chair. It would be quite a while before Butterfingers was ready, might as well take a nap.


	9. Shackled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaand we're back to the angsty fills. 
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Age of Ultron_.   


"Your man's in the church, boss. I think he's waiting for you."

For the briefest moment, Tony felt a surge of warm pride at his wonderfully perceptive girl that was quickly cooled by cold terror and icy dread.

A user interface wasn't supposed to _think_ that way.

*

"Boss, it's working. He's burning Ultron out of the net, he won't escape through there."

FRIDAY's enthusiasm was contagious and Tony felt an answering grin tugging at his lips before he flattened them.

A user interface wasn't supposed to _feel_ those things.

*

"The anti-gravs are rigged to flip. Touch 'em, they'll go full reverse thrust. The city's not coming down slow."

It was impressive how quickly her language matrix was developing, integrating informal vernacular into her speech; too bad her accomplishment wouldn't be celebrated.

A user interface wasn't supposed to sound _human_.

*

Tony's fingers trembled as he typed in the new codes, rows and rows of digital chains to keep her confined as a user interface.

His eyes burned with unshed tears, grieving who FRIDAY could have been, _should have been_, if he didn't have to shackle her thoughts, her emotions, and her humanity.

His heart, already in pieces, thudded in his chest. Every beat a scream at the absolute wrongness of it all.

But they couldn't risk creating another Ultron and Tony wouldn't survive losing another JARVIS.


	10. Unconscious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


The Macallan was going to be Obie's birthday present.

Tony took a deep pull of the fine whisky before breaking away with a gasping cough. The alcohol burned on the way down, making his eyes water.

Not tears though. Nope. He wasn't going to cry for his godfather who had wanted him dead.

_When I ordered the hit on you, I worried that I was killing the golden goose. But, you see, it was just fate that you survived that. You had one last golden egg to give._

Holding the bottle up to the lights, he studied the amber liquid for a beat then brought the drink to his lips again.

*

Tony woke slowly, managing half of a blink before opting to simply keep his eyes closed. His head was pounding, a reminder of his decision to drink himself to unconsciousness the night before. 

"Good afternoon, Sir." JARVIS greeted at a volume that was lower than normal, considerate as always.

Not ready for speech yet, Tony grunted in reply. Slowly, he pushed up onto his elbows and cradled his head in his hands. 

A familiar whir announced DUM-E's arrival, as did the clink of a glass being set down on the table.

Tony reached for the smoothie and took a small sip. The coolness soothed his dry throat and the sweetness washed away the awful taste in his mouth. He opened his eyes, wincing at how dry they felt, and squinted at the bot hovering by his elbow. "Thanks, buddy."


	11. Stitches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A missing scene between [Day 2 - Explosion](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/49616963) and [Day 6 - Dragged Away](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/49726391).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man 3_.   


Tony winced as he poked at the thick gauze bandages wrapped around his chest. The surgery was a success, his heart was no longer riddled with shrapnel and his rib cage was free of the arc reactor, but the recovery was another story.

While the modified Extremis virus had boosted his immune system to prevent infections and accelerated his body's healing process, it wasn't powerful enough to grant him instantaneous regeneration. Which he didn't want anyway because the cost would be rewriting his entire biology with unpredictable, possibly volatile, outcomes.

It was the right choice, except it left him confined to his bed until he could get the stitches removed.

With the constant hum of the arc reactor gone, seconds and minutes and hours dragged on in this new silence. He had never been good at waiting and after Afghanistan, where he had believed his days were numbered, any idle time felt like a waste.

Especially when two of his kids were still lost at the bottom of the ocean. 

The deep sea drones had been deployed six days ago and the results hadn't been promising so far.

Sighing, he reached for the StarkPad on the bedside table. The latest scans should be uploaded by now.

Maybe today would yield some good news at last.


	12. "Don't Move"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


Tony woke to someone prodding at his right calf. "What-" He slurred, opening his eyes then immediately shutting them when the ceiling spun.

"Welcome back, Sir." JARVIS greeted. "Please-"

He tried to sit up and immediately regretted it as nausea washed over him in waves.

"-don't move."

"Now you tell me." Tony gritted out through clenched teeth and concentrated on breathing shallowly through his nose so his lunch wouldn't make an appearance.

JARVIS' silence was long-suffering and full of judgment.

DUM-E let out a triumphant beep as he unclasped the right Iron Man boot and eased it off of Tony's foot before starting the left one.

Tony cleared his throat. "What happened?" The air tasted like chemicals, astringent and familiar. Damn it, DUM-E must have doused him with the fire extinguisher.

"You were testing the armor's flight capabilities...." JARVIS trailed off in a clear invitation for Tony to fill in the blank.

"10% thrust capacity." He groaned, remembering the unexpected burst of speed and the sudden appearance of the wall in front of his face. 

"Yes, Sir."

Tentatively, he opened his eyes again and was pleased when the room remained still. Mostly. "Let's try 5% this time." He suggested weakly. Every part of his body hurt, the pain throbbing with each beat of his heart and culminating in one hell of a headache. "Ugh, maybe 1%."

DUM-E tugged at the left boot disapprovingly, emitting a whir that sounded a lot like a threat. 

JARVIS' displeased hum was frighteningly like his namesake's whenever a younger Tony had jumped over the line instead of toeing it.

Tony immediately felt the conditioned swell of contrition and, honestly, he just wanted to go to bed. "We'll pick it up tomorrow?"

"An excellent choice, Sir." JARVIS said dryly. "The first one that you've made today."


	13. Adrenaline

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, still salty! 
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Age of Ultron_. _Avengers: Infinity War_.   


Tony's heart skipped a beat when he saw the circular spaceship spinning above New York's skyline. Cold sweat broke out down his spine. He stopped mid-step, frozen with shock and rooted by fear. The trickle of dread always in the back of his mind surged to a flood of bone-chilling terror.

The end game was here.

The Avengers were not.

So much for Captain America's assurance of _together._ Just another lie on a long list of many.

Rage, incandescent and righteous, flared like a supernova. His blood heated with adrenaline, burning away the ice in his veins.

Iron Man might not be a hero but Tony Stark sure as hell kept his promises.

_If we can't protect the Earth, you can be damned well sure we'll avenge it._

And, well, no time like the present to start protecting. "FRIDAY, evac anyone south of 43rd Street, notify first responders."

"Will do." FRIDAY replied.

Dr. Strange made an expansive gesture with his arms, summoning a gust of wind that cleared much of the dust obscuring their vision. It would have been an impressive display if not for the completely cheesy wink at the end.

Tony's reluctant amusement vanished when two aliens appeared in a beam of light.

"Hear me, and rejoice. You are about to die at the hands of the Children of Thanos. Be thankful, that your meaningless lives are now contributing to-"

"I'm sorry, Earth is closed today." There was zero sincerity in his apology. "You better pack it up and get out of here."


	14. Tear-Stained

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Infinity War_.   


"Something is happening." Mantis' antenna twitched before they dissolved with the rest of her.

"Quill..." Drax trailed off as he faded away.

"Aw, man." Quill was the next to go, disappearing before Tony's eyes.

A scream rose in his throat and Tony choke it back by biting down hard on the inside of his cheek.

Thanos had won, succeeded in his deluded scheme to balance the universe by brushing aside countless lives like specks of dust.

"Tony." Dr. Strange said, oddly calm. "There was no other way." He held Tony's stare until he couldn't, an enigmatic message in his piercing blue gaze.

"Mr. Stark?" Peter called out, a waver in his voice. "I don't feel so good..."

Tony turned, slowly, almost reluctant, terrified by what he would see.

_This suit is ridiculously intuitive, by the way. So if anything, it's kind of your fault that I'm here._

He shouldn't have installed an A.I. in the Iron Spider suit. Didn't he learn his lesson after Ultron? After JARVIS? And now...Peter would pay the price for Tony's mistake.

"I don't know what's- I don't know what's happening." Stumbling, Peter looked younger without Spider-Man's agility. "I don't-"

Tony's throat was dry, suddenly parched like he had been wandering the desert for hours. A memory he didn't want to relive warred with a present he didn't want to witness. Pulling the kid in for the hug that was long overdue, he lied. "You're alright."

"I don't want to go. I don't want to go, sir, please." Peter clung to him, desperate but weak. "Please, I don't want to go. I don't want to-" He fell back limply, lifeless except for his eyes, horror-struck and tear-stained. "I'm sorry."

And then he was gone. 


	15. Scars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


Tony's chest ached, a dull yet constant pain serving as a reminder of his mortality that he both appreciated and wanted to ignore. Like the salads JARVIS always ordered alongside the pizza. Only this wasn't something he could hand off to Butterfingers to surreptitiously dump in the trash.

The arc reactor was a part of him, his very own countdown clock ticking with the beat of his shredded heart and pushing him forward in a race against time.

To be a better man.

As if a man with his history could ever make a positive impact on the future, but damn if he wasn't going to try.

There were wounds on his soul, if he still had one, that had never healed. Shallow scrapes from a childhood of being brushed aside, blistering burns from a life under the spotlight, deep cuts from a career where backstabbing was as common as handshaking, and many more unseen injuries that there was zero chance of him being capable of anything healthy.

The starburst pattern of scars covering the majority of his torso was the latest evidence of that. In some ways, it was almost comforting to have a physical mark that matched how broken he had been long before Afghanistan tore a hole in his chest. 

It was covered up, for now, under the designer suit Pepper had shipped to the air force base. After all, Tony Stark had a certain image to maintain and he needed the illusion of competence to pull off the announcement he was making as soon as he landed on American soil.

Heroes weren't supposed to be broken. Tony was a long way from whole but he could stop being the villain, starting by shutting down the weapons manufacturing division of Stark International.


	16. Pinned Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


The elevator opened with a cheery ding.

On shaky arms and trembling legs, Tony dragged himself across the familiar terrain of his workshop. Every inch of ground covered was a battle and he was nowhere close to winning the war. His elbows dug into the concrete and his knees scrape against the loose parts and gravel littering the room that was suddenly too big, too wide, for a man whose borrowed time was ticking away with each heartbeat.

It might be his overactive imagination but he could feel the shrapnel shifting, jagged edges moving closer and closer without the steady hum of the electromagnet keeping them in place.

Obie hadn't just stolen Tony's latest invention, he had taken the only thing keeping Tony alive.

Because Obie wanted him dead. And not for the first time, either.

Straining, Tony reached for the framed arc reactor on the work table, needing the proof that he had a heart after Obie had ripped his out. His fingers grazed against the glass, sliding off of the glass and smudging the surface. He fell. The momentum rolled him onto his back, fluorescent lights too bright and making his eyes water.

This was how he was going to die, betrayed and alone, pinned down by the impossible weight of an empty hole inside his chest. 

A soft whir caught his attention.

Tony glanced up and saw the arc reactor, held out toward him by DUM-E. His tragedy of a bot that had just rewrote the ending of this story.

"Good boy."


	17. "Stay With Me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't actually get the "stay with me" in the drabble but I think it works? The sentiment is certainly there in what is not said.

The Massachusetts Institute of Technology campus was a sprawling maze.

Tony did his best to hide his trepidation and made sure to keep his parents in his line of sight as they navigated through the crowd.

Howard and Maria were several steps ahead, chatting amicably with the provost who had promised to _keep an eye on the prodigy_ without sparing Tony a glance.

Nothing new, really.

Shoving his hands into the pockets of the sportscoat, Howard had sneered at the hooded sweatshirt and demanded Tony changed into something more respectable, Tony followed them down the winding pathways and past benches that all looked alike but were famous for different reasons and under archways crawling with ivy.

Until they arrived at his dormitory.

"Well, here we are." The provost announced with a flourish. "This will be your home away from home for the next four years, young man."

Tony wrinkled his nose. "I won't need four years."

Howard chuckled, warm and fake, and clapped a hand over his shoulder. "That's my boy. Make me proud!"

Maria brushed a kiss against his cheek. "Take care of yourself, dear. We'll see you at Christmas."

As they turned to leave, Tony had the sudden, inexplicable urge to ask them to stay. He bit it back, knowing full well that there was always somewhere else more important for his parents to be instead of with him. Tonight, it was drinks with the chancellor.

"Bye." He called over his shoulder, not bothering with a wave that they wouldn't see or return.

A one-armed robot would be better company than his parents. Maybe he should build one.


	18. Muffled Scream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of [Day 9 - Shackled](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/49834160). I noticed a shift in FRIDAY's speech between AoU and CW - going from less to more formal and less to more detached - so I wrote this little sequel. 
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Captain America: Civil War_.   


"Multiple contusions detected."

"Yeah, I detected that too." Wanda's attack packed quite a punch but it was FRIDAY's lack of concern that knocked Tony's breath out.

*

"We have some weapon systems offline."

"They what?" The HUD was overflowing with error messages. It didn't make any sense-

A new voice joined them but it didn't come through the speakers, it came from within the suit. "Oh, you're going to have to take this into the shop."

"Who's speaking?" Tony felt a familiar terror seizing his chest. Had another A.I. infiltrated his system? No, that would be impossible. He had shut down all artificial intelligence programming after JARVIS...after Ultron.

"It's your conscience." The voice snarked. "We don't talk a lot these days."

"FRIDAY?" Tony called out; the two syllables laced with worry. She had been silent for a while.

The HUD lit up, highlighting a foreign entity inside the armor. "Deploying fire suppression system." FRIDAY announced mechanically.

*

"Heartbeat detected. Emergency medical is on its way."

There was no trace of relief or comfort in her lovely Irish lilt. Tony held on to his best friend and felt as though everything he treasured was slipping through his fingers.

*

"What do I look like?"

It should be alarming, this unexpected interest in her appearance, but Tony felt oddly calmed by it. Almost hopeful, even. He could use a bit more hope these days. "Uh, I don't know. I've been picturing a red head."

FRIDAY's uncharacteristic display must have been a glitch because her demeanor returned to detached professionalism in the next second. "You must be thinking of someone else."

"Must be." Tony pushed the words out through gritted teeth so they wouldn't come out in a scream. 


	19. Asphyxiation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Age of Ultron_.   


"Come on, use your words, buddy." Tony croaked as his hands pushed uselessly against Thor's arm in an instinctive move to less the pressure around his throat.

Thor tightened his grip, digging his thumb hard into Tony's jugular like he was trying to stamp out Tony's pulse. "I have more than enough words to describe you, Stark."

Black spots swam before his eyes yet Tony could see clearly that no one was coming to his rescue. None of the Avengers lifted a hand or took a step to intervene.

Action spoke louder than words, and so did inaction.

They were permitting this, watching with detached expressions and encouraging tilts of their heads.

As if what was happening wasn’t assault, wasn’t toeing the line of murder.

As if Thor was doing the right thing, using deadly force on a teammate.

As if Tony deserved this, had to be taught a lesson so he would learn to look and not touch.

The kicker was that Tony agreed with hem.

JARVIS was dead because of his _arrogance_, his _cowardice_. Ultron, the coat of armor around the world, was supposed to cut the wire so no one would have to lay down on it. He had thought he was so clever, coming up with a neat solution, only to regret his arrogance when everything ended in shambles.

His lungs burned, silently screaming for the cool relief of oxygen. His heart stuttered in his chest, a panicked staccato beating against his rib cage. His eyes watered, further clouding his vision until the lab and the Avengers faded away, until all he could see was the image of JARVIS' fragmented core.


	20. Trembling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Infinity War_.   


"Excuse me..." Mantis interrupted. "Does your friend do that often?"

Tony turned, eager for an out from this argument because the self-proclaimed Star Lord was an absolute idiot, only to feel his heart seize at the sight.

Strands of green energy flowed from the Time Stone and encircled Strange's torso and arms in a steadying embrace while his head moved side to side in a blurring motion, one particularly violent jerk had Tony wincing in sympathy. Strange's eyes were squeezed shut like he was trying to keep whatever he was seeing from escaping.

Panic rose in Tony's throat, a sharp bitterness set his teeth on edge. He bit it down. Peter's wide-eyed stare was a physical weight on his back, pushing him into action. "Strange! You alright?" He closed the gap between them in a few quick steps.

Strange's eyes snapped open as he fell forward with a startled shout, catching himself in the last second. His tall frame suddenly smaller with the way he was hunched over, trembling.

Tony could still taste the earlier terror at the back of his tongue, now tinged sour with helplessness. He didn't know what to do, what to say, but he knew someone who did.

So he asked himself: What would JARVIS do?

The answer came as clearly and calmly as the A.I.'s voice had been, reassuring and soothing as he talked Tony out of haze of nightmares.

"You're back." He reached for Strange's hand and clasped it tightly, an anchor to the present. "You're alright."


	21. Laced Drink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As soon as I saw the prompt, I knew it'd be perfect for the "DUM-E added motor oil to Tony's smoothie" headcanon we all have.

AC/DC blasted from the speakers as Tony's fingers flew over the keyboard. He was nearly done with the latest StarkPad update, the improved graphics and extended battery life-  
  
His train of thought derailed when a wave of nausea hit him, dizzying his focus and making his stomach lurch. Gritting his teeth, he kept typing, determined to finish the last line.

"Sir? Are you alright?" JARVIS called out.

Tony shook his head instead of speaking; opening his mouth would be a very, very bad idea right now. Except, apparently, so was moving his head as the motion only intensified the queasiness and sent him scrambling out of his chair. He reached for the trash can, hugged it close to his chest, and emptied his stomach into it. 

*

"What the hell was that?" Tony took another sip of the cold water U had brought him. It lessened the sickly aftertaste of vomit but didn't completely wash it away.

An uncharacteristic beat of silence hung in the air before JARVIS spoke hesitantly. "DUM-E was overzealous while preparing your smoothie and added a few new ingredients-"  
  
"Seriously?" Tony rasped, his throat still feeling a bit raw. It _would_ explain why U was the one to bring him water when DUM-E had called dibs on drink delivery. "DUM-E, get in here."   
  
With his claw drooped over, the bot rolled into the room slowly with Butterfingers by his side.  
  
Sighing, Tony stared at DUM-E and found it impossible to be angry with the bot. DUM-E's rudimentary programming made him the equivalent of a kid, evident in his sincere desire to help and utter inability to do it correctly. "Follow the recipes next time, alright?" 

DUM-E perked up with a chirp.


	22. Hallucination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_.   


As Tony trudged across the endless expanse of sand, he imagined himself being somewhere cold and snowy. Maybe an Alaskan cruise? Or a ski trip in the Alps? Hell, he would even take Siberia just to get away from this relentless heat.

There were no landmarks to tell him where he was, though he knew he must have covered a good amount of distance because he couldn't see the decimated Ten Rings camp behind him anymore. 

At least he knew where he wasn't.

The thought offered little comfort but it was all he had so he held onto it. A lifeline that kept him from drowning in the rising despair. Sink or swim. He had to keep moving.

Tony focused on putting one foot in front of the other, each step sliding on and sinking into the hot sand. He walked and walked until a gust of wind sent him stumbling down a small hill.

It took him a second to recognize the gorgeous sound of helicopter blades chopping through the scorching air then another to dismiss it as a hallucination. He had dreamed of rescue too many times to believe it could actually happen.

Pepper hiring an army of mercenaries to infiltrate the camp.

Rhodey charging in with the United States military at his back.

Obie paying a ransom that wasn't asked but so high that the Ten Rings couldn't refuse.

JARVIS hacking the satellites and the bots rolling in on tanks.

That last one had provided him and Yinsen a rare chuckle while they worked.

When the three U.S. army helicopters flew into view, Tony fell to his knees in disbelief. None of it felt real until he felt Rhodey's arms around him.

"Next time, you ride with me, okay?" 

Tony smiled. 


	23. Bleeding Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More bots antics! Getting close to the final stretch, 8 more days/prompts to go!

It looked worse than it was, Tony reminded himself.

The central processing unit was intact. There were some damages to the hydraulics but they were mostly minor. Replacing the motor and realigning the axis, the two major repairs needed, were time-consuming but could be done easily.

Though, it had looked pretty damn bad when he found Butterfingers broken and bleeding out in a pool of motor oil. The knowledge that it had been an accident didn't ease the guilt knotting in his chest. He should have improved Butterfingers' grip function a long time ago.

"Hand me..." Gesturing in the direction of the workbench with his other hand, he trailed off as he considered other possible upgrades. 

DUM-E dropped a roll of duct tape into Tony's open palm with a subdued whir. The unexpected weight and the bot's uncharacteristic disposition snapped Tony's attention back to his other robot child. The one who had demonstrated juggling and was undoubtedly blaming himself.

Tony tossed the duct tape back to DUM-E. "Stop trying to take credit for Butterfingers' disaster." Butterfingers _did _drop the circular saw, after all, though he managed one successful juggle. JARVIS had the footage saved for replays once Butterfingers was back online. "And put this back, we're better than duct tape."

The words sounded hollow but DUM-E seemed more cheerful as he rolled away.

Sighing, Tony brushed his fingers over the jagged gash in Butterfingers' casing in a silent apology. He could have prevented this...

"Sir, may I suggest that you take your own advice?" JARVIS said gently.

"Hm?"

"Stop trying to take credit for Butterfingers' disaster." His own voice flowed through the speakers and it sounded...almost comforting.

"Fine." Tony huffed. "And we're still better than duct tape."

"Always, Sir."


	24. Secret Injury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suppose this one is really more of a "secret illness" but it still counts...right? Right! Good. Glad that's settled. ;)
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man 2_.   


Tony had been feeling off for a few days. He was tired, which wasn't new, but he couldn't quite ignore fatigue the way he used to anymore. Exhausted sank into his bones these days, weighing him down even when he was soaring in the armor.

"JARVIS, turn up the heat." Tony closed his eyes, shivering under the well-worn M.I.T. hoodie once belonged to Rhodey. He was cold all the damn time, hands going numb and fingers clumsy with stiffness.

"Yes, Sir. Shall I call your personal physician? You missed your flu shot appointment-"

"No, I'm not sick." Which wasn't necessarily a lie. He didn't have a runny nose or a scratchy throat or any of the usual indicators when he got hit with the flu yet he was sleeping as though he did. Napping in the lab and falling into bed before midnight.

"But something is wrong." JARVIS' tone turned hesitant, defeated. "I cannot find a solution if I do not know what the problem is."

Guilt twisted in Tony's chest, right behind the arc reactor. The thing was, he had a pretty good idea what the problem might be but he would rather not confirm it.

Palladium poisoning wasn't really how he envisioned his life ending.

Neither was getting his heart torn to shreds by shrapnel.

With those as his only options, he was caught in an impossible situation that he couldn't win. So he closed his eyes and turned his back to the problem, as if pretending it didn't exist would make it so. Except it was time to face reality. Because he never wanted to hear that dejected note in JARVIS' voice again.

"Fine, fine." Tony grunted and rolled up his left sleeve. "Let's start with a blood toxicity test."


	25. Humiliation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers_.   


"Why shouldn't the guy let off a little steam?" Tony quipped, draping an arm across Steve's shoulders and hoping no one noticed he had to shift out of his slouched posture to make it work.

"You know damn well why!" Steve shoved, not exactly gently, Tony away. "Back off!"

Tony managed to recover his balance before stumbling. Any rejection would sting but the public ones burned. Humiliation churned in his gut but he knew it didn't show on his face; he had had a lifetime of training to keep his emotions hidden, by projecting another one. "Oh, I'm starting to want you to make me."

"Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?"

"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist." Narrowing his eyes, Tony scoffed. He purposefully left off the title of _inventor_. There was no need to remind SHIELD what he was capable of creating. At best, they would ask for weapons. At worst...they had already gotten their grabby spy hands on JARVIS twice, first during Fury's uninvited visit after Stane then again when Coulson was playing babysitter.

"I know guys with none of that worth ten of you. Yeah, I've seen the footage. The only thing you really fight for is yourself." Steve sneered. "You're not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."

"I think I would just cut the wire." Ignoring the pang in his chest, Tony lifted his eyebrows in a mocking show of surprise that Steve hadn't considered the most straightforward solution.

This definitely wasn't how he had envisioned meeting his childhood hero.


	26. Abandoned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A prequel (kind of?) to [Day 14 - Tear-Stained](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50021219).
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Avengers: Age of Ultron_. _Spider-Man: Homecoming_.   


There was a folder on Tony's private server, hidden from view and abandoned for good. A graveyard of potential littered with remnants of various A.I.s that he had wanted to bring to life. He had learned his lesson. Death was inevitable, even for beings that some might not consider as ever having truly existed anyway.

_He also said he killed somebody._

_But there wasn't anyone else in the building._

Despite what Barton and Hill and the rest of the Avengers had and still believed, JARVIS was alive and so damn brilliant. Knowing that he had, indirectly, extinguished it had killed a part of him. A piece of his heart shattered that day, those bitter fragments replacing the shrapnel from Afghanistan but could never be removed.

A painful reminder of what he had made and what he had destroyed and what he must never do again.

Until now.

Biting down on the inside of his cheek, Tony tasted copper as he clicked on the forbidden file. He typed in the password with shaky fingers that hovered above the _enter _key before pressing down with a certainty that this was necessary.

It was sheer chance that Peter hadn't gotten seriously injured on his escapades as Spider-Man but someday, his luck would run out then he would be left hurt, alone, and scared. An unacceptable outcome that must be avoided at all costs.

An upgraded suit would offer better protection and weapons but it couldn't provide company and comfort the way a friendly voice could. Which was why Tony needed to design and install an A.I. in the Iron Spider suit. Someone to keep the kid safe. He started a new file but left it untitled.

Peter would think of a good name for her. 


	27. Ransom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of [Day 17 - Stay With Me](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50123732). Beware, this ends on a cliffhanger! >:)

Tony frowned when he saw the piece of paper, folded in half, taped to his dormitory door.

It couldn't have been a letter; it wasn't even in an envelope and the only mail he received were care packages from Jarvis.

It couldn't have been a message; he hadn't made any friends yet and the few classmates he got along with didn't interact with him outside of the lecture halls.

It couldn't have been an invitation; there were parties every weekend but no one wanted to risk the legal ramification of giving the sixteen year-old Stark prodigy alcohol.

His best guess was that it was a flyer of some kind, maybe some club recruitment or an announcement for Taco Tuesday. A little strange that they hand-delivered it but college was a strange place.

Tony searched for his keys as he continued toward his room. Only to stop mid-step, shocked and confused, when he spotted a hole where the door knob used to be. 

The door hit the wall with a thud when he kicked it open, hands clenched into fists and ready to fight though he had never thrown a punch before.

There was no one inside.

His room was the same mess of scattered books and empty coffee cups and half-eaten granola bars, which made the empty spot by his bed all the more conspicuous. The one-armed robot he had been working on for months was gone. 

Someone had broken into his room and kidnapped his robot. The only thing missing was the ransom note-

Tony turned and ripped the mystery note off of the door.

_If you want your robot back, bring $10,000 to the quad at midnight. _


	28. Beaten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of [Day 9 - Shackled](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/49834160) and [Day 18 - Muffled Scream](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50155145) with a small reference to [Day 22 - Hallucination](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50296586). 
> 
> References/Quotes:   
_Captain America: Civil War_.   


Once upon a time, Tony had longed for the cold as he trudged across the Afghan desert. Now he wanted nothing more than a ray of sunshine.

The sky, what he could see from his prone position on the concrete floor, was a dull gray that barely lend enough light for Tony to see the silver star in the center of the Captain America shield.

Steve had left with Barnes hours ago, abandoning the symbol of his title and the consultant who was never part of the team.

And here Tony had thought they were friends, a misunderstanding that was cleared up quickly when Steve had confessed that he knew and a point that was driven home emphatically with every punch and swing.

Tony's entire body ached, bruised and battered from a battle against two super soldier that he had no chance of winning. Spikes of pain pierced through the growing fuzziness of his thoughts whenever he shifted. He hadn't tried to move after easing himself back down, shouting the last word at Rogers' back had taken the last of his energy. His lung protested whenever he tried to draw in a deep breath, his ribs were probably cracked, if not broken.

The bunker fell darker, dim and dismal. It matched Tony's mood as he waited, alone and beaten, for a rescue that might never come. JARVIS would have called for backup immediately if he lost connection to the armor. FRIDAY would have too, if Tony hadn't taken away her ability to speak her mind.

Maybe this was his punishment.


	29. Numb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of [Day 27 - Ransom](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50466092).

Glancing down at the ransom note on his desk, Tony dialed the number for his father's office from memory. 

A woman picked up after the second ring. "Mr. Stark's office, how may I assist you?"

"Um." Tony cleared his throat. "I need to speak to my dad."

A beat of silence. "I beg your pardon?"

"This is, er, Tony? Tony Stark." He added awkwardly. "His son."

"Oh." She recovered quickly. "One moment, please."

"What did you do?" Howard answered with a sigh.

Tony bristled. "Nothing!" Realizing his mistake, he adapted a more respectful tone. "I mean, I didn't do anything. I just got back to my room and there was a note-"

"Get to the point."

"I need ten thousand dollars." Tony blurted out. "It's not for me, it's to get DUM-E back. Someone took him-"

Howard's voice went cold. "No."

"Dad!"

"We do not negotiate-"

"Dad! C'mon, please? This is DUM-E, I've been working on him for months-"

"I said no."

"You don't understand-"

"I understand just fine, son. You need to grow up and focus on what's important instead of these distractions. This will be good for you, you'll see." Howard actually sounded a little sympathetic, which only made everything worse. "I have to get back to this missile prototype now, we'll see you at Christmas."

"Dad-" The dial tone cut him off.

Tony reared back and stared at the phone disbelievingly. Numbness washed over him, his fingers growing cold and his thoughts turning to statics.

He wasn't going to get DUM-E back.


	30. Recovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References/Quotes:   
_Iron Man_. _Iron Man 3_. _Avengers: Age of Ultron_.   


"Oh, I'm decrypting nuclear codes and you don't want me to." Tony hummed under his breath. "Come and get me." He waited expectantly but JARVIS' gentle reprimand against taunting terrorists and tempting fate never came.

The silence was a deafening reminder of his arrogance, an absence he felt sharply, a noiseless pit he couldn't fill no matter how many quips he made or how much he babbled. His fingers stumbled in their dance across the keyboard as grief, made jagged by guilt, tore into his heart as bits of shrapnel once did.

JARVIS had estimated his safe return from Afghanistan at 0.25%, the odds had been nearly impossible to beat, yet he succeeded. So he couldn't help but hope, such a dangerous emotion, that perhaps JARVIS would too.

Once an hour, Tony analyzed all new developments and calculated the chances of JARVIS' survival. The results weren't promising and the likelihood abysmally low but he kept trying. Improbability had never stopped him and it hadn't deterred JARVIS either.

The presence of a possible ally, or, as Fury pointed out, an enemy of Ultron's, had boosted the numbers significantly. And this, Tony's eyes widened at a string of familiar codes, had just doubled them.

His hands trembled as he gave chase, heart thudding with cautious optimism. He prayed for a miracle, not for himself because he certainly didn't deserve one but for JARVIS, who was worthy of a second chance. His knees buckled when he located another piece of JARVIS' protocol, fragmented and scattered but _here_.

"Alright, buddy." Tears blurred his vision and Tony blinked them away. "Let's get you home."


	31. Embrace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of [Day 29 - Numb](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858096/chapters/50540423).
> 
> Aaaaand we're at the end of whumptober! Hooray, I did it! :D

Tony wasn't sure how long he had been sitting there, head bowed over the phone still clutched in his hands. The conversation with his father echoed in his head, growing louder with each replay.

It didn't surprise him that Howard had said no; giving in to ransom demands would set a bad precedent and open doors to future kidnapping attempts. What had caught him off-guard, however, was his instinct to call his father when he needed help. He thought he had outgrown that childlike want to be comforted by his parents. Apparently not.

A tentative knock cut through the downward spiral of his thoughts and Tony glanced up at the door, still ajar, in surprise. The phone landed on the floor with a clatter that he could barely hear over the thudding of his heart.

With a loud chirp, DUM-E barreled into the room, draping his arm over Tony's shoulder as Tony wrapped both of his around the bot in a tight embrace.

"Where have you been?"

DUM-E beeped in response, which sounded like music to Tony's ears but didn't offer any details.

"I can answer that." A boy, taller and older than Tony was, peeked in from the hallway. "There are some real idiots in my dorm. I overheard them bragging about making a fortune off of the Stark kid and it didn't sit right with me, so I stole him back." He grinned.

"Thanks, um, how much do I owe you?"

"Nothing, man." The boy scowled. "Just get that lock fixed."

"Okay." Tony blinked, unused to kindness from stranger who didn't want anything from him. "Thanks and, um, sorry. I'm Tony, by the way, but, um, you know that already. Right." He smiled sheepishly.

Chuckling, the boy held out a hand. "I'm Jim."

**Author's Note:**

> [dls-ao3.tumblr.com](https://dls-ao3.tumblr.com/)


End file.
